I know that was an odd way to start off a post, especially since I haven’t posted in over a month, but I have been thinking about that a lot. Because I am the type of person to get so hyped up about miniscule events, but why? When there are people who could care less about an achievement when their child is sick in their arms. It is hard to place value on moments when we have never been in a dire situation. We always return to the habits we become accustomed to—whether it is at school or work, unless something changes in our life that forces us to look at things from a different angle...
Besides the physical aspects of eating well and exercising, I don’t know if anyone knows the exact answer. Each individual is created differently. Maybe some of us crave that social sphere of support to feel warmth, others may just need nature, and I myself just need bouts of quietness. Or maybe it is a combination. If there is one thing I know that’s truth for me, it is that nothing melts my worries away except being present. That doesn’t mean forgetting or pushing crappy situations aside, but acknowledging them, noticing them, and then focusing on something else, something that is better (in my opinion).
I’ve been meditating a lot since I first cast my resolution. I am not saying it as praise for achievement, nor do I always do a great job at it on nights when I am tired, but I realize that as human beings we do have determination. We do have the ability to push forward and sit through uncomfortable situations. We may hate it, our heads may scream at us, but the work, whether mental or physical can be done. And I’ve realized that sometimes I am not going to want to do something, like my lacrosse practice tonight, but the more I work on myself the more I have loosened those areas to fill lighter, to smile at the better moments, and defocus those less memorable ones.
I don’t know how we should be happy. I never ask how to be happy all the time, because it is inevitable that unhappy events will come our way. But for me, being right here, addressing why we don’t feel good, and how it can change makes me feel a little better.
You know what else inhibits happiness? Our society. Look everywhere and there’s this construction that we must have perfection in every area.
Have human beings ever craved for perfection more than we do now? I’m not sure. But if I can guess one thing, hunter-gatherers certainly weren’t striving for perfection, but survival and their leisure time and health are all areas that seemed to have surpassed ours.
Am I boring you? Probably. I tend to ramble on a lot in case you haven’t noticed. I don’t have a solution for completely avoiding sad situations. They are going to appear. But like a cut on one’s finger, taking the pressure off of that spot, choosing not to focus on it, can alleviate a lot of pain. My Dad always says, that if you had just won a million dollars, that finger wouldn’t hurt so much anymore (granted that’s a capitalistic American comparison, but it works to show the point).
Try it and maybe like me, you’ll find those annoying events a thing of the past, so that you can smile. We only get one race in this life—let’s not waste our time forgetting to indulge in family and friends and the stuff of life that makes happy moments—so that we can cross the finish line fulfilled.
This weekend I assessed what I need to do to improve my well-being even more—I feel like a paradox because I do so much to be in the best condition yet I often feel so overwhelmed. But, I came up with a couple conclusions:
1. Walk outside more. I was looking at pictures from the summer and I seemed my happiest after I had been golfing or walking whether with a friend or alone. The weather seems bad, but I am going to try to get out more.
2. Spend more time with my Mom. Today we ate lunch together. I think it was the first time this entire school year! It seems like we have both been really busy, but I think one-on-one time with children is essential.
3. Relax more. Yes I meditate, but I still need to work on taking a step back when my workload at school gets to be too much. After all, high school is just another journey that is supposed to be an optimistic opportunity. In my last two years, I want to make sure I do that, and don’t forget to connect with my friends.
I had more goals, but they all slipped my mind now, so I guess I’ll just have to bring it up again in my next post. I haven’t written in awhile because nothing came to mind. I don’t just want to mindlessly write, I want my words to have meaning. This topic has been brewing in my mind—the inquiry of happiness—so I felt I should write a bit on it. On that note, I am signing out. Have a smiling week, I will write soon.